By Franziska Dotzauer
I going to be honest here, I hate making decisions. And while I’m by no means a star in the decision-making department, the husband-to-be isn’t even close to being a sparkle. So naturally, he hands the responsibility to me. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining, my dear fiancé takes about an hour deciding on a packet of ham when grocery shopping. The more choices he has, the longer it takes him to figure out what the wants. He told me recently, it took him four months to decide on my engagement ring. Four months!!! I’m surprised we got engaged after only four years of dating. If I consider the amount of time it takes him to decide what to order at a restaurant, it’s a miracle he decided on a ring in only 16 weeks. But since I try (very hard) to be a good fiancée and future wife, I leave him out of most of the decision-making processes, especially when it’s to do with the wedding. If he planned the wedding we’d be married by 2018, at the earliest.
But enough about my future hubby, I actually wanted to tell you a little bit about the tough nature of wedding choices. Organising a major event like this one, throws up many questions and choices that need to be addressed, pronto. So here are my three major headaches of recent.
Size does matter
One of the first decisions you’ll have to make is on the size of the wedding, purely because everything else depends on it. Is it going to be big or small? How many friends and family do you want to invite? How many people can you actually afford to host? Obviously, you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but you have to draw the line somewhere. A small wedding is much more intimate, you get to spend more time with each guest – if that’s what you’re after. A bigger wedding gives you a bit more freedom in terms of things you can do, but it’s definitely not going to be an intimate gathering, rather a huge fest. It’s a tough one, really. And no wedding guide will be able to help you with this. I suggest, you sit down and figure out who YOU want to spend the most important day in your life with. My advice, don’t invite anyone just because you “have to” – it’s your big day, after all.
Kids, children and the little ones
Phew, this is difficult. When you’ve reached a certain age, kids are inevitable. People have children, period. And if you’re not a mummy or a daddy yet, and aren’t even close to considering becoming one, it can be a bit hard to understand why parents are so obsessed with their kids. So, when it comes to your special day, you have to think about whether you want children at your wedding or not. I hear you, girls, children can be noisy, annoying, time consuming and exhausting and you kinda just want your parent-friends to spend one day without them so they can relax. While these are all legit thoughts, you can’t really ask someone to leave their babies at home. So I suggest, leave it up to the parents in question, if they want to celebrate without the little ones, so be it, but don’t ask for it. And come on, aren’t these little guys just so cute in their dresses and suits?
Let them eat cake
What’s it going to be à la carte or buffet? That’s, I guess, a really hard decision for many brides. There are pros and cons to either, buffets give you more variety, but a set-menu is more elegant and definitely less mayhem – at least granddad Pete won’t be tripping over little Joseph if it’s a menu situation.
Anyway, I HATE buffets, there you have it. It all started in kindergarten when we had to line up for our Friday muesli and some kids just couldn’t take it easy and line-jumped. I hated it. And things haven’t changed. Buffets unleash a variety of society’s worst habits, like greed, envy and hate – and yes, I am being slightly dramatic. At weddings with a buffet I always wait until all starving, clearly malnourished guests have loaded up their plates with literally everything the buffet has to offer, starter, main and dessert – all at the same time. When I finally make a move and try to find something edible beneath all the left-overs and parsley, it happens that the chummy nephew of someone’s second cousin is already up for round two, what? I’ll never understand why everyone acts like their going to starve to death when they see a buffet. Have you heard of a wedding where someone had to starve? No? Me neither. So, yeah, à la carte it is.
Are you planning a wedding too? Do you have any comments, suggestions or worries? Feel free to share your own stories with us in the comment section below!